'Tis Better to Have Loved and Lost, Then Never to Have Loved at All.

Love. It's one of the most powerful and most enjoyable emotions gifted to mankind. Like a drug, it infects our very soul, totally orienting our entire perspective on life around one, singular person. In a true love (forgive the cliche) the happiness of someone else becomes an integral component of our own happiness. Suddenly, our lives are turned inside out and upside down as we reorder our lives completely to encompass a greater purpose: the service of someone else. When they laugh, we laugh. When they cry, we feel their pain. When they fear, we are there to comfort them as best we can. Love forms a symbiotic relationship. The two parts sustain each other and function together.


However. There is risk involved. Love is not for the faint of heart. To totally depend on a person distinct from oneself requires trust that can be incredibly difficult to muster. Imagine you are standing at the edge of a crevasse in the fog. You can't see the other side, but something wonderful beyond imagination waits for you. Do you trust that you'll land safely? The joy of love returned irrevocably changes our very being. But not everyone lands safely. It is far too easy to fall into the abyss of ignorance or crash into the craggy rocks of rejection. To be honest, this second outcome is far more likely than is achieving the sublime joy of reciprocated romance.


Is it even worth it? When there is so little chance of success and so great an opportunity for grief, is it worthwhile to take the jump at all? Even with the most bonded of loves, troubles ensue. Why not avoid love?


Because God is Love. Because Heaven is a place where we encounter God's perfect Love, albeit in a finite way. Earthly love cannot compare to divine love of course, but it is one of the ways in which we can try to imitate our Lord.  C.S. Lewis says it very neatly in his book The Four Loves:

"The only place outside Heaven where you can be perfectly safe from all the dangers and perturbations of love is Hell.I believe that the most lawless and inordinate loves are less contrary to God’s will than a self-invited and self-protective lovelessness…We shall draw nearer to God, not by trying to avoid the sufferings inherent in all loves, but by accepting them and offering them to Him; throwing away all defensive armour. If our hearts need to be broken, and if He chooses this as a way in which they should break, so be it."

Our suffering is not pointless. In the Book of Job, we are given three reasons God allows us to suffer: as punishment, to make reparation, and to strengthen us against future assaults. Let us remember the next time our hearts are shattered, gentle reader, that God has a reason for all things and turns all things to good.